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Tips on grieving during the holidays

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Gerd Altmann

While the holidays can be joyous, they can also be a particularly difficult time for those experiencing grief.

Psychologist Peggy DeLong penned the article Coping with Loss During the Holidays after experiencing it herself. She spoke with KUNM in 2021 about tips for grieving during the holidays.

“Anticipate the difficult moments and plan for them, because they can be turned into something very meaningful,” she said.

That could include taking on the traditions of the loved one who died, like cooking their signature dish. If having that person’s empty chair at the dinner table will be too painful, DeLong recommended removing it or filling it with something that represents them.

She encouraged grieving people to find compassion for themselves if they’re not exactly in the holiday spirit, but to also allow themselves any delight that may arise.

It's not a betrayal to experience joy,” she said. “In fact, it can be one way to honor that person's memory.”

The Grief Center of New Mexico and the New Mexico Crisis and Access Line can offer additional support this holiday season.

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Nash Jones (they/them) is a general assignment reporter in the KUNM newsroom and the local host of NPR's All Things Considered (weekdays on KUNM, 5-7 p.m. MT). You can reach them at nashjones@kunm.org or on Twitter @nashjonesradio.